Just yesterday, I was watching an episode of a TV show, and something happened that caught my attention. One of the characters in the show was going through a rough time, and he finally blurted out the question "Why is God punishing me?!" in front of a Rabbi. The Rabbi, who had hitherto bit his tongue, simply turned to the man and said (paraphrased) "All God ever did to you was give you a body, a brain, and a soul. Everything else is on you, so why don't you use that brain that God gave you an figure out which of your actions led you to this experience." Its a simple, short conversation, but it has a lot of merit. We are all responsible for what we experience, and blaming others for the shitstorm at our doorstep and in our homes doesn't remedy the issue.
The food we eat, the people we interact with, the music we listen to, the shows we watch, the books we read, the places we go, what we think, how we choose to feel, and everything else that we do or don't do is a decision. Every decision changes who we are inside and out, binding us to our fate and changing our course and tying us further to it. That's life, and understanding this immeasurably important fact is the first step towards attaining sovereignty over ourselves and our lives.
Attitude is everything, so the moment you stop blaming others and become accountable for your own actions is the very moment you start realizing what you need to do to fix things. When you accept what you've done, you can realistically chart a course that'll help you to remedy things.
As a case in point, a friend of a friend recently found out that he has cancer. He went from being a cheery bloke with a great sense of humor to a shadow of what he was...all overnight. The cancer hadn't changed him, but what did hit him is that all of the chewing tobacco and cigars he had adored up until that point had poisoned him. Now, despite knowing that, he's all but given up. In giving up, he's chosen not to fight the cancer in his body and overcome it; instead, he will be consumed by it. This choice will kill him, but no one can convince him otherwise because he hasn't chosen to do something about it.
Knowing this, be mindful. Go out, pay attention to what you're doing, and then enjoy what you do. Live a little.
Blessings and warm regards,