Having said this, I urge and advise you to recognize that you are not built for this! Be gentle with yourself as you're dealing with these major concerns that are so far beyond the norm. Be patient with yourself and when you find yourself struggling, recognize and address it. You are your very own Morgan Freeman, and your inner narrative directly influences how you see yourself AND how you connect to the world.
If you find that you're being overly harsh with yourself, ask yourself if this is how you are with others. Are you this caustic towards your friends and family, or do you give them a little bit more patience and leeway? Recognize just how far outside of the scope of normal this situation is and be as kind to yourself as you would want others to be to you. Then, try to do the same thing with others each and every day.
Someone told me recently that positivity is like a breath of fresh air, and so I have been trying to keep this in mind each and every day as we trudge through quarantine and all that 2020 has to offer. I would urge you to do the same; you have made it this far & that is something to be proud of!
Much love from the PNW,